I'm so heavy in your arms

Okay.
I'm freaking out.

My first interview for ASM is tomorrow, and I'm scared.
What if I just go in there looking like an idiot?
What if I blank under pressure?
WHAT IF I'M JUST GENUINELY UNPREPARED?!
Oh dear.

I'm not ready for this.
I mean, I know it's just Starbucks to some people.
But this is what I do. And I need this promotion. I'm scared that if I don't get it, my debt is just going to get worse.
I need the money.
And I'm not going for the job just because of the money. I really do enjoy my job, and I'd like to move up.
I'm panicking. I hate this.
God, help me with this.

I'm going to be great, right?
And I'll get a second interview, right?
And then I'll get a promotion... right?
And in a perfect world, I'll be moved closer to home, right?!

agh.

Ummm... happier topics...
uhhh...
I really really really like my man.
That's good, right?
I mean, I sometimes get scared that it's all too good to be real, and it's all going to come crashing down. And then I remember that he's a good guy. The others weren't. It will be okay. It will be great.
I could write about him all day, but that would be weird. All I will say is, he makes me happy. So very happy.

Oh, wow. Writing that actually did take my mind off of the worry for a bit.
That was nice.
Anyways, time to sleep, I think.

Wish me luck!